Friday, August 12, 2011

So my mom found out i was gay!?

i am a 19 year old female and im bisexual. its been confusing figuring that out and labeling myselfe as that. it hasnt been too hard to come out with friends because of the era im in where people are more open minded about things like this. but i have always been pulled back when it came to my family. weve never really had that picture perfect family due to some alcoholism in the family (not getting into specifics). point being i moved out when i was 16 and cut all ties with my family except for my younger brothers. we didnt talk up until this year when my mother had a change of heart about having me "part of her family". i was reluctant at first due to resentment i had built up towards them from the past. but we have been getting alot closer and though its not quite the best i think its as good as itll ever be. now to my issue..a couple days ago i was out with a female and well we got kinda touchy. to my suprise my mother bursts out yelling no! your not doing this here no! in my defense it was really late and i thought she was asleep. my mother isnt very gay friendly so immediately she let me know her disaproval. she called me disgusting and hasnt talked to me since. she wouldnt tell my dad so when hes around she acts like everythings okay but she cant even look at me in the eye:( after so many years of not really having my mother around and now that we were getting so close it seems like its back to square one and once again im the black sheep. i can understand the shock of finding her daughter borderline having sex and more so with another female. i dont know how to fix this and its really breaking my heart to see her react this way. i never been so ashamed of what i am till now and its horrible having her make me feel so low again. she doesnt seem like shes going to let this go anytime soon and its been a week! anyone have any helpful advice? weve never had a heart to heart kinda conversation and its so uncomfartable and embarrassing that this might have to be it..

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